Child Discipline, Training, and Education (Part 2)

III. Training and educating children. 1. The goal of educating children is to bring them to maturity. A. Maturity - The state or quality of being mature (having the powers of the body and mind fully developed); fullness or perfection of development or growth. B. Jesus Christ is the standard of maturity (Eph 4:13). i. Jesus was trained up by his parents who provided Him with a well-rounded and quality education (Luk 2:51-52). a. He matured: 1) intellectually (in wisdom). 2) physically (in stature). 3) spiritually (in favor with God). 4) socially (in favor with man). b. It is important to make sure each of these elements are included in your children's education. ii. A mature person possesses wisdom which brings life to its fullest potential (Pro 4:7-13). C. A child's education should start very early (Isa 28:9). i. The things of God should be among a child's first concepts and words. ii. Children learn first by imitation, then orally, and then by reading. iii. Watch what you say around them because they absorb both good and bad. iv. They understand more than you think. v. Your example of godly living and religion will teach them more than your words. 2. The responsibility of child training rests on parents, not the local, state, or federal government. A. Modern, secular education is described well in 2Ch 15:3. i. Government schools are "without the true God, and without a teaching priest, and without law." ii. Consequently, we are witnessing unrest, great vexations, and destructions (2Ch 15:5-6). B. Fathers, not State bureaucrats, are told to bring up their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Eph 6:4) (this responsibility can be delegated - more on that later). i. Bring - v. 27. bring up. a. To bring into a higher position; to elevate, raise, rear, build up; to raise to a point or amount, etc. b. To rear from childhood; to educate, breed. ii. To bring up your children is to educate them. iii. Nurture - 1. Breeding, upbringing, training, education (received or possessed by one). b. Moral training or discipline. iv. Admonition - 1. The action of admonishing; authoritative counsel; warning, implied reproof. v. Admonish - 1. gen. To put (a person) in mind of duties; to counsel against wrong practices; to give authoritative or warning advice; to exhort, to warn. vi. Mother's are also supposed to help in this duty (Gen 2:18; Pro 1:8). vii. The father is the guide of youth (Jer 3:4). viii. Paul assumes that fathers exhort, comfort, charge, and warn their children (1Th 2:11; 1Co 4:14). ix. Fathers should have more weight in influencing their children than other instructors (1Co 4:15-16). x. The book of Proverbs presents a father instructing his son in a wide variety of subjects (Pro 4:1-4; Pro 23:15-26). xi. Fathers are supposed to train up their children in the way they should go (Pro 22:6). a. Train - III. 5. To treat or manipulate so as to bring to the proper or desired form; spec. in Gardening, to manage (a plant or branch) so as to cause it to grow in some desired form or direction, esp. against a wall, or upon a trellis or the like. 6. To subject to discipline and instruction for the purpose of forming the character and developing the powers of, or of making proficient in some occupation. (Also with up.) a. To instruct and discipline generally; to educate, rear, bring up. 1611 Bible Prov. xxii. 6 Traine vp a childe in the way he should goe. b. When a child is trained up in the way he should go (not in the way he wants to go), he will not depart from it when he is old. c. Like the prodigal son, he may depart from it for a season, but every parent's hope is that they will return to what they were taught. d. Make sure you have trained them up in the way they should go if you expect them to not depart from it when they are old. e. Don't live with regret because you didn't take the time to train them up right and they strayed from the Lord. xii. A father's primary duty should be to educate his children in the Lord's ways. a. This will include every area of life as God through His word guides and regulates all aspects of our lives. b. Education - 1. The process of nourishing or rearing a child or young person, an animal. 2. The process of ‘bringing up’ (young persons); the manner in which a person has been ‘brought up’; with reference to social station, kind of manners and habits acquired, calling or employment prepared for, etc. 3. The systematic instruction, schooling or training given to the young in preparation for the work of life; by extension, similar instruction or training obtained in adult age. Also, the whole course of scholastic instruction which a person has received. Often with limiting words denoting the nature or the predominant subject of the instruction or kind of life for which it prepares, as classical, legal, medical, technical, commercial, art education. c. Educating your children ensures they are prepared for the work of life, including religious instruction, scholastic instruction, social instruction, and vocational instruction. C. The most important area of your children's education is teaching them God's truth in the scriptures. This is God's commandment in the N.T. (Eph 6:4) and it was also God's commandment to Israel in the O.T. (Isa 38:19). i. It was the fathers who were supposed to make known God's truth to their children. ii. Too often today the only religious instruction kids get is from their mothers because the fathers abdicate their responsibility. iii. God's word should be passed down from the fathers (and mothers) to their children (Psa 78:4-6). a. It is important to do this so that the wonderful works of God are instilled in the minds of your children (v. 4-5). b. They then can teach them to their children who then can teach them to their children (v. 6). c. This is done so that each new generation can set their hope in God and not forget His commandments (v. 7-8). d. This is why churches die - the generation which saw the works of the Lord pass on, and the upcoming generation doesn't know them (Jdg 2:10). e. Think about this in our situation: many of us experienced great deliverances from God from lives of sin, false religion, and false doctrine and we are forever thankful for what God saved us from. f. But your children will grow up in the church, not having seen the same great deliverances in their own lives. g. They don't have to spend years searching for that pearl of great price; it's right in front of them. h. You must tell them of the wonderful works of God in your own lives and teach them His truth and impress upon them how important it is. iv. This is done by incorporating the scriptures into every aspect of your family's life (Deu 6:4-9). a. God's words first need to be in your hearts, parents (v. 6; Pro 3:3; Pro 6:21). b. Once they are stored in your heart, you can mediate on them throughout your day (Psa 119:97; Psa 1:1-3; Jos 1:8). c. When the scriptures are in your heart and on your mind, they will guide you when you are on the go, when you are sleeping, and when you wake up (Pro 6:22). d. When the word of God is an integral part of who you are, then you can teach it diligently to your children by incorporating it into all you do (Deu 6:7). 1) When you sit in your house (at the dinner table during meals is a good time). 2) When you are walking by the way (or driving places with your kids). 3) When you lie down (praying with them before bedtime). 4) When you rise up in the morning (around the breakfast table). v. Learning and living the scriptures will give one more wisdom and understanding than enemies, teachers, and ancients (Psa 119:98-100). vi. Teaching children the things of God contrasts forgetting the things of God (Deu 4:9-10). a. Parents who do not teach their children have likely forgotten what God has taught them. b. Parents who teach their children better remember what they themselves have learned. 3. Parents should directly take part in their child's education. A. This should include teaching them the scriptures. i. This should begin at birth (or before) by reading the scriptures together with your children present. ii. If the only exposure to Bible reading your children get is at church, you are wrong. B. This should include teaching by your example. C. This should include early education like teaching them proper grammar, how to read (which is the most important skill you can teach them), how to count and do basic math, etc. D. This can include fully educating your children by homeschooling them. i. This may not be for everyone. ii. It is a good way to limit the indoctrination your children will receive in public or private schools. iii. It is a good way to limit the amount of sinful garbage your children are taught at school and pick up from their friends. iv. It is a good way to limit the amount of control and influence that the government has over you and your children. v. Homeschooling is a major task and commitment. a. The majority of this responsibility will fall on Mom since Dad is away at work for most of the day. b. This means that Dad will likely have to help out around the house (cleaning, laundry, dishes, etc.) since Mom will be spending much of her time doing schooling that she would have been doing those other things. 4. Parents can also delegate this task of educating their children to others, but the responsibility of their children's education still rests on the parents. A. Paul was brought up at the feet of Gamaliel and was taught by him (Act 22:3). i. Bring - v. 27. bring up. a. To bring into a higher position; to elevate, raise, rear, build up; to raise to a point or amount, etc. b. To rear from childhood; to educate, breed. ii. In other words, Paul was educated from childhood by a teacher who was not his parent. B. Samuel's education and upbringing were entrusted to Eli (1Sa 1:24-28). C. Paul used an illustration of a child being under tutors and governors at the behest of his father to describe how the church was under the law for a time until it grew up (Gal 4:1-2). D. Delegating your child's education to another may be a necessary alternative to doing it yourself. i. If you chose this option (public school, private school, homeschool association) remember that the responsibility of ensuring your child gets a good education is still yours. ii. You would do well to investigate the school they are attending, get to know their teachers, and regularly review their text books and homework to ensure that the material is high quality and that it is free of moral filth. iii. Be ready to counter-teach your children if they are attending public or private schools, as they will be taught lies such as evolution, acceptance of the homosexual lifestyle, and false doctrine in general. iv. If you entrust their education to a public school with no oversight on your part, don't be surprised if your child doesn't make it through unscathed. E. One entity that you must be very careful delegating much of your child's education to is the TV. i. The TV will teach your children much, most of which will not be good. ii. Evil communication corrupts good manners (1Co 15:33). iii. It will also teach them to have short attention spans and to not appreciate reading and real learning. iv. If you use the TV as a babysitter, be prepared to face the consequences. 5. There are limits to what can be accomplished by education. A. No matter how qualified the teacher, nor how correct the method, nor how good the curriculum, a stubborn fool will not learn (Pro 1:7; 17:16; 27:22; Jer 17:23). B. Education will not change peoples' nature; only God can do that. C. Education will not produce paradise on earth; only God will (2Pe 3:13).